From the Rumor Mill: He-Man to Replace Castro?

21 02 2008

by Todd Weathers, FHM’s new gossip columnist.

According to Washington insiders and officials within the Cuban government, Castro stepped down only after securing He-Man to take his place. We here at Find He-Man find these rumors impossible to believe for several reasons.

fidel_castro.gif

For one, He-Man has never once wavered from his love of capitalism and the United States of America. Two, if he wanted public power, he could instantaneously win election in this country…. No matter what office was in question. And finally, He-Man is anti-smoking, why would he rule a country whose identity is wrapped up in cigars?

With the rumor mill unable to answer these seemingly obvious question, it is clear that He-Man isn’t going anywhere.

Don’t fear people, He-Man only wears red when coordinating his outfit.”

Todd Weathers is a world renown gossip columnist. He has written gossip articles for the New York Times, The Wall Street Journal, and The American Journalism Review.

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